LacyCat

2009-11-07T14:22:00.002-07:00

Leaves are Falling on My Head! Happy Halloween!

2009-11-05T16:19:00.012-07:00

Katrina came down with Zoe for Halloween. Uncle Aaron enjoyed the company! Of course if Katrina and Zoe are near...Aunt Nell is sure to be close by! We all enjoyed the company! Especially Grandma N! It was freezing all week and Katrina got sick with a cold. Zoe got reaquainted with long lost family (only a couple of months lost but to a baby an eternity!) So, finally on Halloween it warmed up, but not until after the freeze sent the leaves dropping by the bagfuls. Great opportunity to go play. Not so great for allergies! Lots of fun though. Here are a few treasures.
one
two
three
whee!

Uncle Aaron also got the biggest pumpkin ever! It ended up being a family project to carve it!Forgot to take the after picture! So Sad! Then to end the evening.... Trick or Treat!

Paid in Full ( a lesson on Humility)

2009-08-23T22:41:00.001-06:00

A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious, and somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angry, he shouted at his father and said "with all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house.
Many years passed and the young man had become very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father now was getting old, and thought perhaps he should go see him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still gift-wrapped Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had carefully underlined a verse, Matt.7:11, "And if ye, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Heavenly Father which is in Heaven, give to those who ask Him?"
As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had wanted. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.
How many times do we miss God's blessings because we can't see past our own desires?

2009-07-08T20:46:00.002-06:00

Make us One
By Sally DeFord

How shall we stand amid uncertainty? Where is our comfort in travail?
How shall we walk amid infirmity, when feeble limbs are worn and frail?
And as we pass through mortal sorrow, how shall our hearts abide the day?
Where is the strength the soul may borrow? Teach us thy way.

Make us one, that our burdens may be light
Make us one as we seek eternal life
Unite our hands to serve thy children well
Unite us in obedience to thy will.
Make us one! teach us, Lord, to be of one faith, of one heart
One in thee.

Then shall our souls be filled with charity, then shall all hate and anger cease
And though we strive amid adversity, yet shall we find thy perfect peace
So shall we stand despite our weakness, so shall our strength be strength enough
We bring our hearts to thee in meekness; Lord, wilt thou bind them in thy love?

Take from me this heart of stone, and make it flesh even as thine own
Take from me unfeeling pride; teach me compassion; cast my fear aside.
Give us one heart, give us one mind
Lord, make us thine
Oh, make us thine!
http://www.defordmusic.com

2009-04-02T11:48:00.003-06:00

I'm it! Maybe this is a hint that I've not written for a while!
Kristin Compton tagged me:

4 Jobs I've Had:

1. Worked at McDonald's

2. Worked on the Labor Gang in the Phelps Dodge Mine in Tyrone, NM shoveling rock
and coal dust. Hardest Physical job ever!

3. Piano Teacher

4. Childcare

4 Movies I've watched more than once:

1. Seven Brides for Seven Brother's

2. Lord of the Rings

3. Little House on the Prarie series

4. Love Comes Softly series

4 Places I've Been:

1. California

2. Myrtle Beach, NC

3. England

4. Niagra Falls in NY

4 Places I've Lived:

1. Silver City, NM

2. Las Cruces, NM

3. Albuquerque, NM

4. Rio Rancho, NM

Iv'e wandered far..............

4 People Who Email Me Regularly:

1. Katrina

2. Aunt Tina

3. Carol Bowerman

4. Brenda Parsons

4 Favorite Foods:

1. Chinese

2. Duth oven chicken

3. chicken chimichangas with red and green chili

4. Asparagus,zuccini,portabella mushrooms, onions saute'd with garlic salt

4 Things I'm Looking Forward to This Year:

1. Stress relief

2. Trip to Utah

3. Wedding over

4. Time with my mother

4 TV shows I Watch:

1. American Idol

2. Heros

3. Lost

4. Dancing with the stars

4 People I Tag:

1. Heather C

2. Rendie M

3. Jeri S

4. Krisie Leigh

The day I said goodbye!

2009-01-28T10:59:00.003-07:00

The Sunday before Christmas, I received a phone call from my mother saying that the nurse was seeing all the signs that death was close at hand and she should call her family. I threw some things in a bag and the car and took my kids to see my dad. It was so hard when we saw how much he had declined in a month with the last bout of pneumonia and a lung staff infection. He had lost so much weight that he looked like a holocaust victim. every bone stuck out and he had to be padded so not even the blankets would touch his skin. His skin was broken out with bed sores. His muscle was completely decomposed. I could almost touch my thumb and middle finger as I put my hand around his calf. He could no longer take in any nourishment or he would aspirate and we'd have to suck it back out to keep him from choking. I was able to get maybe 2-3 Popsicle like sponges soaked with water down him before he would again choke. His urine output was diminishing and he was unable to communicate with us other than the tears that would stream down his face. I spent the next 24 hrs getting as much water down him as possible. His tongue and lips were dry, cracked and bleeding. I would swab out his mouth and chunks of skin would come out. I reflected on words my Daddy had said many years before when his mother was in a nursing home. He said he never wanted to live with no quality of life and be taken care of like that. My Daddy gave me so many opportunities for music, dance, and any other activity we wanted to try. When I was a little girl and taking lessons, he'd ask me to sing " How much is that doggy in the window" It is such a silly song, and I'd get embarrassed. He said I pay for all these lessons and no one will sing me my song. Once in a while I'd appease him and sing it. As I layed next to him and cared for him, the only gift I could still give him was to sing. I layed next to him and hummed or sang all the hymns, primary songs, and yes even "How much is that doggy in the window" My mom kept saying she didn't know what he was waiting for to go home to Father in Heaven. I knew and I think all my siblings and mother knew too. He had lovingly cared and protected us his whole life. Mother would tell Daddy that he better not die and leave her with all this... She wouldn't make a very good widow. I could see Daddy hanging on for all of us. I in my heart hoped for my mother's sake that he would hold on until after Christmas, but knew it was fair to ask that of him. I knew he needed to go home and be at peace. I felt torn as my husband was home and Christmas was in two days. I told my mom I didn't know what to do. It would be Kristin's last Christmas at home and maybe Eric's for at least 3 yrs as he was contemplating serving a mission for the church. If he did he would have to soon start the application process and leave sometime this summer if accepted and approved. Mother said that even if he passed away today or in the next couple of days, There is nothing the funeral home could do until after Christmas. She said to go home and have Christmas with my family, that it was up to the Lord now. I spent the last night on a mattress on the floor by Daddy's bed to continue giving him water to moisten his mouth and put a jelly in his mouth so it wouldn't crack. I sat on a chair by his bed for a good portion of the night to spend as much time as I could with him. I so didn't want to go home, but we packed everything. I delayed and delayed. I finally asked my mother and my siblings if we could have a family prayer surrounding Daddy before I left. I had tried and tried to get the words out to tell Daddy that it was okay to go home to Heavenly Father, but I just couldn't do it. I could say it silently in my heart but not out loud. I told mother that I thought the reason he was hanging on was because he needed permission from us kids and her to go and asked if it was okay with her to do that before we left. She said yes and we called my sister in Arizona that was not there. She had been down the week before and stayed for a week. We didn't want to disclude her or take an opportunity for her to say goodbye without her. We called and arranged for her to go to a quiet place at work and put her on the speaker phone. We surrounded Daddy in love and decided that each of us would tell daddy what was in our hearts and end with a family prayer. My brother and sisters have gone far away from the church over the years, yet still feel the truth in their hearts. My brother turned to my son who is a priest in the LDS Church and said "Son, you are the only priesthood holder and you know what needs to be done for grandpa, you need to say the prayer to let him go." My son began to cry and said he didn't think he could. My brother said yes you can, it's okay. I told him he could start and I'd finish. We each told Daddy how much we loved him and that we were all there to take care of mother. We knew his body was tired and it was time for him to be free from this worldly turmoil and go to Heavenly Father. Everyone told him it was okay to go and mother told him she would be okay and didn't want him to suffer any more. He needed to go and prepare a place for her and she would join him when it was her time. Eric layed his hands on Daddy's head and through his sobs and tears, proceeded to Pray. My Eric is a young man of few words and his prayers are usually very short simple and childlike. Heavenly Father put the words in his mouth and he gave the most profound grown up spirit filled prayer I have ever heard. He told his grandpa that it was time to go home and Heavenly Father was awaiting him. He said that His Father and Mother had also been waiting a long time to be reunited with him as well as his sisters. He had lived a long fruitful life here on earth and he needed to now get reacquainted with his other family. He had another wife before he married mother that died in a car accident not long after the birth of his first child. His daughter was very sick and died also at the age of 7. He needed to now take care of and get to know her. Eric said he released Daddy from this earthly life and was entrusting him to our Father in Heaven. I ended with a family prayer and we all said our goodbyes and left for home. It was the hardest trip home ever. The next morning mother called and said he passed away peacefully in his sleep. It was an incredible experience to see my son step up to the plate and do such a grown up thing. I don't think any of us will ever forget this day. The love, compassion, and admiration, we all felt that day. Families truly can be together forever, and although we have to say our goodbyes for a time here on earth, it will only be a short while til we will be reunited and never have to say goodbye again. I can see my Daddy smiling, running, working again with his hands and still watching over us from Heaven. What a wonderful Christmas gift for him to be in our Father's arms and with our Savior Jesus Christ!
We held his funeral on December 30th. Mother had wanted me to sing a song I wrote many years ago and I didn't think I could. I rewrote some word as my wisdom and maturity have grown over the years and I did sing one last time for my Daddy with the help of my girls as we said our last goodbyes. Then we all sang at his grave site "God be with you til we meet again"
I am so grateful for the family history program that lets us find our ancestors, get to know their histories and helps us connect and seal them to us for eternity. I can't wait until it is my turn to return home to Father in Heaven and personally meet each and every one of them and say..."I didn't forget about you... Your life on earth was important to me and I am so glad to finally meet you.....Now we are together forever!

The following is some thoughts and memories of my life with my Daddy. It is only a small sampling as it will take me much more time to record and recall all our memories, but here are some of the most memorable to me.

My Daddy
By
Nancy Kay Catanach

My earliest memories of my Daddy were when I was between 2 and three. We had a 3 bedroom home that Daddy built little by little as he had enough money to buy more supplies. We moved in our house when I was just 3 months old. Daddy and Mother had their room, Linda and Renee were in another room and Lloyd had his own room. I stayed in my parent’s room for four years until Linda went to Las Cruces to live and work. Because I was in there so long, I can still remember standing up in the crib and hollering for my parents. I was also very attached and as you can guess quite spoiled. Even when I moved into the other room later, if I got scared I’d get to climb into bed with him and mother until I felt safe, settled down, and fell asleep. Then he’d carry me back to bed.
I’d even decide to stay at my grandparent’s house when we’d go to visit and before the night was over, Daddy and Mother had to come and get me. One time I didn’t have a choice and had to stay as Daddy and Mother had to go out of town on business. I cried and cried, Daddy promised me he would bring back something special, upon return they brought home a puppy, part beagle and part wiener dog. We named her princess and Daddy said she was the ugliest princess he had ever seen. He always liked to tease and make jokes even with the puppy. He’d get a permanent marker and draw pinwheels around her eyes and over her head with swirls and lines down her back. Eventually they’d fade and go away, but people would see her and say “What kind of dog is that! I’ve never seen anything like it!” Daddy would just laugh and never told them about the markers. He also liked to feed her peanut butter, which she loved, but he would laugh and laugh as she tried to get it unstuck from the roof of her mouth with her tongue.
We never went without but my parents were very frugal. We learned to make our own fun. They used to say only boring people get bored. He always let us use any scrap materials around the house as he was a do it yourselfer. He had wood, wheels, pipes, nuts and bolts, nails, paint, you name it and he probably had it. Mother had sewing materials. We made all kinds of things. Sleds, go carts, windmills, Barbie doll furniture, play house furniture, tree house ladders and storage, stilts, etc… He could build any kite made (or at least we thought he could) we’d build them and mother would give us scrap material for the tails and off we’d go to fly kites. There was always something we could make. He’d take paper and make us the best paper dolls ever! Even when my best friend Paulette’s father built her a playhouse, Daddy went out to the front porch made of concrete and underneath it there was an enclosed concrete storage area about six by twelve feet. It was only about 4 ft high. The floor was dirt. He moved out his lawn mowers and odd and end equipment, swept out the cob webs and bugs and said have fun. We swept it out and made it our playhouse, put in old furniture or made pretend stuff from Daddy’s scraps. I thought it was the best play house ever as long as Daddy kept sweeping out the bugs!
He was the best bug killer ever as I was terrified of anything that crawled except lizards and horny toads. One time he told me and Paulette that we could get some scrap wood to make a table to have a picnic on in the yard. We did and decided to just lay it across our laps. As we began to eat, my legs were tickling and we flipped the board over to find………….a gigantic tarantula! I peed my pants, screamed, cried as Daddy came running. It was one of the biggest he had ever seen. He began pounding it with a shovel until it was dead. Daddy to the rescue once again!
I couldn’t stand it when Daddy would go and do electrical jobs or jobs around our property without me. Daddy couldn’t stand for me to be sad, and more often than not I’d get to tag along as “Daddy’s helper”. I’d hand him tools, tell him the colors of wires (he was color blind), play with new found friends as he went to different locations, etc… anything to be with him. My elementary school was close to his electrical shop. Mother would work in the office sometimes and I’d walk there after school to “help” Daddy fix things. He seemed to always have a project for me. I was always amazed. Later in years I found out that he never wanted to hurt our feeling by telling us he had to get some work done, so he’d take a break from work about a half hour before school got out and make a project such as hammering nails into wood. I’d get there and he’d say sweetheart I have a job for you, do you think you could help me… I need that piece of wood, but there are nails in it……will you pull them out for me?” I’d get the hammer and pull nails out to my hearts content and he’d be able to finish his work. The best part was that when I was done, we’d go next door to the Rexall Drug Store and get ice cream or chocolate malts at the soda fountain.
He never made us feel like he was too busy to spend time with us. Sometimes he worked two jobs to make ends meet so mom could be home with us as much as possible. He’d get done and come home asking who wants to go for a ride. We’d go on a mountain ride and hear stories from his childhood, go rock hunting, arrow head hunting, check out old mines, go visit old cemeteries where different family members were buried, go hiking, fishing, picnicking, camping, snow sledding behind the pickup, anything to spend time with our family. I was always so oversensitive and always looked out for the underdog.. Daddy used to go deer hunting and once in a while we’d go as a family. I thought it was fun. The first time I saw a dead deer in the back of a truck I got hysterical as I thought Daddy had killed Bambi. It took a while to calm me down. Another time I went to my room crying because I saw them cutting up a deer hanging in the garage. We’d take lunches and sometimes camp while he went. One time I wanted to go with him and he said he didn’t know it would be hard climbing and he might have to run if he saw a deer. I told him I’d keep up. We hiked and hiked and found a rock on top of a hill to rest on. We pulled out something to munch on and Daddy spotted a deer. He said to stay put on the rock and he’d come back for me. He took off running with the gun and all of a sudden what he was about to do became a reality for me. It wasn’t like rock hunting or arrowhead hunting, he was going to shoot something. I began screaming “Daddy don’t kill Bambi, Please don’t kill Bambi!” He said again stay there and don’t move! He came back a while later with me sitting on the rock, tears flowing, and having trouble breathing. I asked him if he killed Bambi and he kissed me and hugged me and said, “No, I didn’t kill Bambi lets go find your mother and go home.” He said I ruined hunting for him that day.
Daddy would come home no matter where he was or what he was doing to tuck us in and say goodnight and go back to work or whatever he was doing. He couldn’t stand it if we were home sick. He’d take off on his breaks to come check on us and feel our heads. Bring us something special to cheer us up. Poke vitamins down us and anything else he thought might help even MOM (milk of magnesium) to clean us out!
One of the most special gifts my daddy gave me was the gift of the gospel. Mother taught us and gave us the opportunity to learn of the Savior and His teachings by herself for many years. Daddy always encouraged us and supported us but was not a member. He had investigated the church several times and I had seen many of my friends get baptized by their dad’s. I was so sad that he might not be able to baptize me. I’d come home from my friends baptisms and cry. He’d ask me what was wrong and I’d tell him. He joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and was baptized by my brother when I was eight and baptized me on October 24, 1970. I couldn’t have asked for a more special gift than that!
When I was small Daddy used to put me inside the steering wheel of his pickup truck and I’d turn side to side.(usually on long trips to the Gila or Mountains) He started teaching me to drive when I was thirteen. We’d go out on the back roads and he say okay sister lets try it. Of course his philosophy was if you can learn to drive a standard you can drive anything. He would find an intersection that stopped on a steep uphill climb, stop the car, put it in first gear, and pull the emergency brake. I’d try to start the car, ease off on the clutch and push the gas only to find out time and time again I had stalled the car. We also had a cleared area across the street from us where the kids would play baseball in the summers. The small trees and weeds would grow up and he’d take the Volks Wagon over there and have me drive around. Who knows how many weeds and trees I drove to the ground learning to drive. He also made us take all the wheels off the car and put them back on so we’d know how to do it in an emergency. We learned how to check the oil and change it “Yuck”
A week after I got my license we went to California to my sisters in our motor home. Daddy drove most of the way and early morning he asked if I’d like to drive. He said to wake him up when we were about to get into Los Angeles. Well…..we got there about 7:00 in the morning and I hit rush hour. I kept banging on the roof above me where the bed was in the motor home and I couldn’t wake Daddy up. I was in a middle lane and cars were all around me. Motorcycles were making their own lane and I couldn’t move over to exit. I started crying and just kept driving. I still don’t know to this day what exit I finally got off of when Daddy got up and talked me off the freeway. Coming from a small town I had never seen anything like that.
Shortly after that trip we were going to Hurley to see my grandparents as we made at least weekly trips. I put on my signal to turn left onto their street and Bam!!! Glass was flying, half the car was gone and I was in my dad’s lap. A car behind me had been traveling 90 mph and tried to pass me as I made my left turn. He hit me broadside. When my dad saw his lights he grabbed my clothes and ripped me from my seat to his lap or I would have been dead. I was looking out my window when he hit and I was wearing shorts and short sleeves. I had glass cuts everywhere, but miraculously I got none in my eyes or anywhere vital. I knew then that God must have greater, future plans for me as he spared my life that day. Again my dad thought of me first and foremost and my safety before his.
Another example of this was the time Daddy, Mother, and I went up to Signal Peek. Mother wanted to pick raspberries as they were ripe and ready to harvest. We drove up to the lookout tower and climbed up to look over the city. Then we went back down where we had seen several bushes full of raspberries. The mountain had been hit with bad weather before we went up and a tractor had plowed the road. Mother got her gloves on so the thorns on the bushes wouldn’t get her and headed to the bank to start picking. Daddy and I were digging in the truck for gloves for us when we heard this shrill scream “Lesterrrrrrrrrrrr…………” It seemed to fade away and we went running. The bank had been hollow under her and gave way. She plunged head first down the hill about 15 feet. Her first reaction was to put her hands out. Her arms went under a log and her face hit the log. Daddy scrambled down after her and as he carried her up all I could see was blood everywhere. Daddy always had scrap rags in the cars for just in case. He gave her a rag to blot the blood to reveal a huge gash above her eyebrow and a puncture wound into her sinus. He threw us in the truck and told her to put pressure on it. I sat in the middle between them and Daddy flew down the mountain (literally). It was @ an hours drive to the hospital and we made it in about 30 minutes. The road had tight pin turns and steep cliffs that dropped off the side of the road. At times we only had two wheels on the road and two over the cliff. I was so scared. The road was dirt and bumpy and as mother tried to hold the rag over her face, it would bounce up and down. The blood kept squirting everywhere. I’m sure I didn’t help as I yelled “Daddy is Mommy going to die?” I began praying that we’d get there quick and safe, as I’m sure my parents were too. Daddy had lost his first wife to a car accident years earlier and buried his baby girl at the age of seven. He was so protective of us and couldn’t stand to see us sick or hurt. We made it to the hospital and the Dr. had to cut mother’s clothes off her body, they did x-rays and rushed her to surgery to stitch her up. I thought for sure I might lose my mother that day. The Lord has also spared her life more than once for his greater purpose here on earth.
We all took various lessons and Daddy was always there to support us. Daddy and Mother were our private cheering squad encouraging us in whatever adventure we undertook. I ran track in High School and it wasn’t as easy as the music or dance and I was trying to learn to get out of the starting blocks faster. He did track himself when younger and one day when I came home, he had built me my own set of starting blocks to practice on. We’d put them on the dirt road out front and he’d give me hints, encourage me, and time me. I never was great at track, but I enjoyed Daddy’s encouragement, love, and help in my endeavors.
My Daddy was taught that boys didn’t cry his whole life and we very seldom saw tears from him. We’d get in trouble and he’d have to go to the other room and cry so we couldn’t see him, but we heard him. The day he took me to college, unpacked my things and left me there, I saw my daddy sob. There was never a lack of love from him.
I missed home so much when I went to college. I would come home on the weekends I could on Friday and stay as late as I could on Sunday night. It used to worry my parents so much. I went home one weekend for my best friend Pamela’s wedding. Still in my formal and High heels, I headed late to my dorm in Las Cruces. I began driving and between Hurley and Deming I got tired and dosed off. The next thing I knew, my car was in a spin and I was off the road. I didn’t know which was to Deming as I was disoriented. I got out cried a while and began looking around. I could see the smoke stacks in the distance from the Kennecott Copper Mine. I got back in the car and continued to Las Cruces. I went through Deming and began the next stretch of the trip. I was within 30 minutes of Las Cruces when …. “thud, thud, thud” I had a flat tire. I got out and thought crap I have to change a tire in my dress. I got out the jack and the spare and noticed, I didn’t have just one flat, but two! I thought to myself that there was nothing for miles around and it would be better to drive on the flats and ruin the rims than stay in the middle of nowhere. I drove until there was nothing left of the tires and saw a trailer off to the right of the highway. I got out and crawled through the barbed wire fence (in a formal and high heals) and headed for the trailer to ask for help or call Daddy. As I approached the trailer, there were no lights on and dogs were barking. There were five Doberman pinchers on heavy chains around the perimeter of the trailer. They weren’t going to let me anywhere near there and no one came out to see what the ruckus was all about. I started walking back and I started praying for help. About the time I started to climb back through the fence a car came behind me on the frontage road. I ran down and they opened the window. Cigarette smoke bellowed out into my face and I started explaining what happened. They paused and began speaking to me in German. I finally pointed to my car, mimed picking up a phone, and said police. They looked confused at me. I knew I could only be a few miles from the border patrol station just outside Las Cruces so I pointed that direction and said again police, police. They opened the car door and motioned for me to get in. It was a six passenger car and I made seven. I don’t know why I got in a strangers car, I said a quick prayer and felt no anxiety of danger. I sat on their laps and we drove a few miles until I saw the border patrol station. I pointed and said police and they let me out. I walked across the highway and down the side of their trailer. As they heard the clicking of my heals on the sidewalk they stuck their heads out in disbelief of what they were seeing. I got in there and told them my situation and wanted to call Daddy to come and help as he had many time before. They told me that there were no phones there only a radio to dispatch in El Paso, TX. They called dispatch and had them call my Daddy to come and pick up the car, called my roommate (who called my boyfriend, not husband), to come get me. I went on to school as soon as they arrived and Daddy took off from Silver City with not one but two good tires to rescue me once again. He got home about 5 in the morning. He never got mad or chastised me, just was greatful I was okay. No task even in our stupidity was ever a burden to him.
The summer after my first year of college, Daddy said that the mine where he worked was hiring college students who’s parents worked in the Phelps Dodge Copper Mine as laborers. It was $10.00 an hour. I was so excited at the thought of going to work with my daddy. Some were placed in the office, some went to the electric shop, others went to the mill. Wherever it was, you couldn’t work in the same place as your parent. I was hoping for the office. I was quite shocked when I found out that I’d be working in the mill. I’d have to were a helmet with a light on the front, safety glasses, metal toed boots, respirator masks and gloves as I’d be shoveling and hauling wheelbarrows of ground up rock dust three levels underground, shoveling and hauling rocks that fell off the conveyor belt, and even using picks and shovels to break up the rock hard residue left behind in the railroad cars from the ore. Daddy was a foreman in the electric shop and he’d come by to check on me. I didn’t know he would watch me from afar as I shoveled the dirty stuff. I’d get the wheelbarrow full and start to push it and it would tip over sideways. My foreman would say fill it up again and I’d start over again. I’d keep working tears streaming down my face. Daddy would tell me sister don’t fill up the wheelbarrow quite so full and put all the weight up front not on the handles. He’d ask the foremen how I was doing and they’d tell him I was a hard worker but they didn’t know if I’d make it past two weeks. Daddy told them that he taught us to work hard and not give up. He said I’d be alright. I soon found muscles I never knew I had and came home filthy. Mother would strip me under a blanket at the back door and I’d go shower. It was the hardest job I ever had and the best as I got to spend every day where my daddy worked. We’d talk everyday on the ride to and from the job, about 40 min each way. I also had to get up at four o’clock in the morning, and I’m not a morning person. My time with Daddy was so worth it!
As I became a wife and mother his support never waivered. He was always there for me. Even when I had early labor and was put to bed rest, mother being a school teacher couldn’t leave for that long, Daddy came up and took care of me, the house and Katrina. The kids always knew that he’d have some kind of treat, candy or something in his pocket and could talk him out of anything. He was such a push over. When Danielle began talking we were trying to get her to say “Hi Grandpa” It would always come out “Pockets” We’d keep telling her “no Grandpa!” But for several years she called both her Grandfather “Pockets”
My boys did scouts and they loved to go home and get tools from grandpa. Eric and Daddy made a toolbox and filled it with tools. Daddy, Eric and Aaron built bird houses and anything else that the boys might be working on. It was great to see his skills passed down to the boys. They treasured helping him and learning about different skills and tools.
One of the greatest bonds I felt with Daddy was when we lost our baby girl after birth. After losing his first wife and burying his baby girl Karen at the age of 7, he understood what my loss felt like. I know that he is now with his family that have passed before him, including his mother, father, sisters, his first wife, his baby girl Karen and his grandbaby, my daughter, Shaina Rose. I am so grateful that we are an eternal family and have the knowledge of the plan of salvation. I know we will be together again, never to be parted and Daddy will be there with arms wide open to welcome me home.

My Daddy, My Hero

2008-12-26T13:18:00.005-07:00

Lester infant

Daddy and Mother get Married

Daddy and Mother in 1982

Daddy and Mother's 50th Anniversary

Daddy and Mother at Nell's wedding

Mother's Birthday Feb, 2008

This is going to be short as I need to pull my time and thoughts together after we get through this week. On tuesday December 24, 2008 My Daddy left his crippled, sick, tired body to go home to our Father in Heaven. He is now with his other family and free from the earthly trials he has endured. One of my favoriete sayings I gave him was " Any one can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a Daddy!
He was my Daddy, my mentor, my teacher, my coach, my cheering squad, my doctor, my protector, my fixer,my hero. He lived a long, happy, tiring, hard working life and always put everyone before himself. He died at the age of 91. Sometime look back at the advances in the world since 1917, You will be amazed at the changes he has witnessed. He will be missed greatly especially by his eternal companion my mom, who spent 62 yrs with him. I am grateful to know I will see him again and we will be an eternal family. Like I know his mother and father were there to greet him, I know he will be standing with open arms to greet me when my time comes. I am most grateful for my Savior Jesus Christ, who made it possible to live again. May he rest from his earthly cares in peace and freedom until we meet again.
"God be with you til we meet again"
I love you Daddy!

Trials strengthen faith

2008-11-19T00:59:00.004-07:00

Last night My dad had a priesthood blessing from one of the members of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. My mom got there this morning and the nurses called in the Dr to check him because for the first time they could hear bowl movements and sound,and his stomach was not distened and hard but soft and supple. His intestines have had no sound or movement since hospitalization and he hasn't eaten for 3 days. They had pumped everything out of him. The Dr said he didn't know how it could be possible(We know how!), because they were talking about either the risk of doing surgery to unblock the intestine and get it functioning or him dying from the poisoning. He had all the signs of bleeding internally.Doing surgery was a bad option as we had been told he'd probably never withstand anesthesia again, it would have probably killed him. Daddy is more at ease, his blood pressure and heart rate are back to normal and they took the tube out of his stomach late this afternoon to start giving him food. He is still not totally out of the woods yet. We will see if the food passes through the bowel. We also don't know if he is still bleeding internally until they see the stool. God had once again performed miracles and blessed our family. He is so much better today and I feel we have been so sent angels to care for him! I have prayed that if it be his time to return home to take him quickly so to not suffer any more and if not be, that the Dr would find out what was wrong and help him. He still must have some unfinished business here...maybe to build our testimonies of faith, I don't know, but he spared Daddy's life this last week for some reason. I still know our time with him is short, but I also know that the Lord will call him home when He is ready to call him home. I hope he can go home and leave this world peacefully at the appointed time from his home and bed with mother with him calm and not in distress, not in turmoil, looking at tubes and hospital equiptment. I close this blog in awe, humbled and grateful for my faith and a loving Father in Heaven!

Life is one trial after another, thank heavens for the blessings!

2008-11-15T11:31:00.004-07:00

I have my van back finally. It took $7800+ to fix it. Yikes. For an accident that involved speed under 15mph. It terrifies me to think what would have happened at the normal speed on the road of 45mph. I am watched over, very blessed and grateful for car insurance!

There have been so many trials in our family of late and this week had to be one of the hardest I've had. I went home on the 7th of November for my dad's 91st birthday. I encouraged my children to come with me as every day with him here is a miracle. Only Aaron and myself went. Every visit home is harder as I see my dad slowly slip away from us. He is slow of speech and his words are very hard to understand. He usually stares or sleeps most of the day and can usually shout out mommy for my mother to come help him. He with much effort can usually voice some needs and concerns.He doesn't react to us there much, but if I would put his face in front of mine and say" Daddy it's Nancy, I'm home!" He would get a sparkle in his eyes and flash me a smile. This weekend no matter what I did, I got no reaction from him. I showed him pictures of the kids and his new great grand baby and he stared blankly. I feed him cuddled him and nothing. He was wheezing in his left lung and we were giving him nebulizer treatments. He seemed to choke on everything and then the wheezing got worse. All of my sibling came down and it was nice to spend the time with them. I didn't go to church on Sunday as I usually do being the only active member. Daddy seemed even worse. He again got choked and I would hold his arms high above his head so he could try to get air in his lungs. I said daddy are you okay and he got out the words "NO". These were the first I was able to understand for the weekend. I held him in my arms and rubbed his head and his breathing calmed down enough for him to sleep a bit. I leaned down and kissed him on the head and said " Daddy I love you so much!" He heard me and began to try in guttural sounds to speak. It took quite a while before he was able to get the words " Me Too!" out. I wish I could in words describe the active, vibrant, hard working, prideful, independent man my father was just a short few years ago. It tears me apart to see him so frail and sickly. He used to tell us when my grandmother was in the nursing home, don't ever let me get to be like this! I know he hates having to depend on everyone and hates not being able to communicate. I know my mother is afraid to be alone and holds on to every precious moment she can get with my dad. Part of me wants to pray him well and the other part wants to see him free of this awful world and safe in my Father in Heaven's arms. Then I feel guilty. I can't stand the thought of him being gone, but this trip I couldn't feel his soul and spirit with me hardly at all. The veil between life and death is very thin now and growing thinner. He keeps asking to go see his mother and father who have both passed away. When my mom talks about us girls coming to see him, he makes comments like " I won't be here and When are my sister coming (they too have already passed away). A short time before his mother passed away she would say that my grandpa had come to visit her and said he'd be coming for her soon. I wonder if this is why he keeps asking for his parents and sisters. I fear that my time is very short here on earth with my father. On Sunday we ate lunch before we had to return home for Aaron to go back to school. Daddy slept all day and he didn't wake up to eat lunch with us. I kept stalling to go home and when he did finally eat, he began moaning with every bite. I told mom he sounded miserable like gas or stomach. His stomach was distended and hard and he kept rocking forward and backward. I asked my brother and brother in law if the could get daddy up and hold him on each side and get him moving to see if maybe gas would pass. They did but Daddy didn't seem to get any relief. Mom went to change him on the hospital bed and he just couldn't get back up. I reluctantly kissed him goodbye and my mom put him to bed. I usually bawl all the way home, but this time I was just numb. It seemed like I said goodbye the last time I was home and all that was there was the vessel or shell of the dad I used to know. I almost turned around over the mountain range and went back home, but I also had an obligation to my son's schooling. I called home as soon as we got over the mountain pass and mother said Daddy's temp spiked and he began vomiting about a half hour after I left. It was so hard to continue driving home. He ended up in the hospital with pneumonia again and obstruction and air pockets in his intestine. They asked mother for her health directive for daddy should they have to do emergency surgery as his bowel could rupture. He was given a blessing and after 3 days his bowel cleared. He is still in discomfort and is still running a temp. They almost lost him again the night before last when his heart rate was extremely fast and he couldn't get any air in his lungs. They again asked mother what to do if his heart should stop. I wonder if my Dad will come home from this one. To anyone who is reading please keep our family in your prayers. I am sorry for the sad post, but this is my journal and place of venting. I needed to get it out.
Steve's dad had spell of non recognition of family members with his Alzheimer's and can be quite mean and rough with his mom. The last few months have seemed to get worse and worse. There has been much contention among the sibling with the stress and again we see Satan try to divide and conquer the family unit. This last weekend Steve's dad didn't recognize anyone and wanted to know where his wife was and when he could go home. This usually passes within an hour to 48 hrs. This time it lasted days. He woke up in the middle of the night Monday and Steve's mom tried to help him get to the bathroom. He didn't recognize her and told her to get out and started hitting her (has happened quite often and is getting worse) She called Steve's sister who had to call 911. They tried to talk him down, but he kept saying he wanted to go home and he'd never hit his wife. They finally had to sedate him and take him to the hospital. Steve's mom and the kids had to make a decision with the social workers as what to do and they finally had to decide on a nursing home for Mom's safety. This is another hard trial and decision for the family as he was abused in the last home they tried to place him. We found out that the facility he went to has two family members working there and one of them will be directly caring for Dad, so that comes with some relief.
I am so grateful that when I feel like I am totally going to lose it and fall into a dark hole I can turn to my Father in Heaven and say I've done all I can do and I can't go any farther, I give this burden to you and ask you to carry me in your loving arms for a while til I can stand on my own two feet again. After a day of crying and praying and going to the temple I have felt him pick me up and He is carrying me. He loves me so much regardless of how unworthy I feel at time of such tremendous blessings. I don't know how people make it through life alone and without him.
There is stress in my marriage because of upcoming events in my children's lives and the trials of life pulling us in too many directions. This too I pray will mend and heal with God's help. I knew one day this would come. I thought I would be prepared, and I wasn't! But this too will pass and I know I will be stronger because of it. I know God lives and loves me. I know families are eternal. I know if my faith doesn't waiver all will be well if I but can endure...........................

October News! Some really unexpected!

2008-10-27T02:50:00.010-06:00

I had a blast in Utah with my kids and especially Zoe. She is a baby doll. I wish it was longer, but I missed the rest of my kids.

I got back in time to see RRHS Band compete in the State competiotion Zia. It was fantastic. I don't think I have ever seen RRHS do so well all around. The music, the marching, the horn section, the visual. Wow! I am so proud. The kids also went to Colorado and did equally well. They also had a blast.

My son decided to live up the life of a senior and become a Rythman for the powderpuff game. Homecoming week. I wish I knew how to post video.... He was sooo graceful......or maybe not. The costume was custom designed by one of the rythmettes. Lovely????!!!!!I do have a few pictures makeup and all.

Eric is the one with very little material covering the middle of his chest!!!Yikes!

I also was in a wreck last weekend and am waiting to see if my van is totaled or not. No one was injured, just my nerves and dignity. No one was sited as it was extreme heavy traffic and due to emergency vehicles trying to get though an intersection. I had to 11 yr olds in my car screaming what direction the emergency crews were coming, while I'm smack dab in the middle of the intersection. The truck in front of me moved forward and I thought that I would be able to move up and out of the way. As I began to move, the boys yells the fire truck is coming right at you. On my right side. I looked to the right and turned back to look at the truck in front of me ( slamming on her brakes and swerving to not hit the car in front of her. I slammed on mine and went into her trailer hitch on the back of the truck. My son started yelling the car is on fire as smoke was coming around his feet inside the car. I quickly evacuated the boys onto the small triangular light median and jumped out of the van. Needless to say the fire truck stayed and took care of us. Not sure what happened to the people they were originally called out to. I didn't know at the time until I went to the car place a took a better look. The hitch went straight into my impact bar in the front of the van and bent it into a v directly into the radiator. So instead of smoke in my van it was the steam from the radiator. I feel very grateful that no one was hurt. The van although we just finished paying it off.... sob sob sob.. is just a thing. Our lives aren't. I am greatful my Father in Heaven was protecting us. I didn't say my prayes that morning as usual to protect us as we traveled for the day. I grumbled about having to drive my boys to an 11 yr old scout camp and stay there doing nothing for the whole day when I had a lesson to prepare for the folling day at church. I was tired and grumpy all day and kept saying what if I went the other way home.... what if I had gone home early and let another mother pick up the boys. You can what if all you want, but sometimes bad things happen and we can't change it. I will be a more concious of saying my prayers, be a little less grummpy, try not to murmer so much in the future,pay mor attention to the car in front of me instead of screaming boys,and the emergency vehicles will just have to be patient and wait for the intersection to clear. All events teach us things. I know that had it been our time to return to heaven, He would have taken us. I also know that because it was not, lessons were learned, faith was strengthen and my testimony of the love and protection of my Savior heightened. I still had to go home and prepare a spiritual message for the next day and had trouble focusing on the task at hand. It took numerous prayers to pull myself together, but once again the Lord took me in his hand and said.... follow me and I will give you peace among trials... and He did. Now I am awaiting their decision to fix or total my van. Getting a rental car was not enjoyable as it smelled like a smokeshop and had a wet puddle of coffe under the drivers side. It was a nice care a Dodge Magnum. Wouldn't mind checking into this for a future car. Finally got another car. Yeah!
smells better.....not quite as roomy and nice, but it smells clean!
See I waited to long to do this again and my post is forever long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Newest news...........................Krisin got engaged on Thursday night. She is so happy she says her cheeks hurt. I promised her sister that I'd post pictures that we took after they came back to the house.

Kristin got together with Cameron at her best friends wedding. He was the best man. they've been together since.

Thursday Cameron told Kristin he was taking her to dinner in old town plaza. On their way he said" lets go over here first". He proceeded to take her to the gazeebo in the center of the park. (They've been here before and he tried to get her to dance with him to no music. She got embarassed and wouldn't) She asked him if he was going to make her dance again... He said no and walked her up the gazeebo. He said he had something for her....(you can quess what she was expecting....) But not whst she thought. He pulls out a box and tells her to open it.... it is a watch.

She reluctantly said oh, thanks, and she asked what that was for... He told her to pull out the stem on the watch... she again asked why and he told her ... so she would know what time he proposed to her...

he then proposed and obviously she said yes. They went back to their car and drove to Cameron's parents house and then mine. We took a couple of pictures.

When he got ready to go home from our house that night he hugged me and said..."thanks for letting me marry your daughter!" I told him I haven't let him yet. After a moment of thought, silence(rare with cameron) and disbelief I think he said...."Well thanks for letting me take the first step to getting there" and laughed. He went home and Kristin said she was starving. He never did feed her. She didn't want to spoil the whole proposal so she never told him she was starving. She had an apple and went to bed. Amazing how filling love is.............

In Utah!

2008-10-08T09:17:00.002-06:00

I came up to see my kidos for a few days. I left with my AAron crying though. Any one who knows us will remember that we are joined at the hip and don't do well apart. He has been fine since I left and his Daddy and siblings have been trying to keep his attention elsewhere.
I got here and Zoe wanted nothing to do with me. Katrina tried to get me to give her her bottle and put her to bed so she could get used to me being here all week. She was not having it. I took a nap in the afternoon and when I got up, Katrina had given Zoe a dose of tylenol, and she was a happy camper.
I got up the next morning apprehensive about how the day would go after our first morning together. I couldn't have asked for better. She was such an angel!! I did figure out after the first morning the she is a TV holic and if I fed her sitting in my lap facing the TV and didn't talk to her she did okay. Nap time came and I went in her room, turned on her primary cd, swadled her in her blanket, sang to her for a minute,layed her in her crib, and she was out. Katrina said she was trying to stretch out her time between feedings from 1 1/2 hours or 2 hrs to between 3-4. I got Zoe up and we played and exercised and after about 2 1/2 hours it was clear she was hungry. I found a pacifier in her toys and washed it and rubbed it on her gums (I think she will be like her mom and get teeth early!)she sucked it in and sucked on it for 45 min and I gave her her bottle. We made it 3 hours and 15 min yeah! I had such a great day. Hope today goes as well. So far so good. She is in her Red Sox outfit today so I will have to take a picture to show Uncle Chad ( he bought it for her Dad last Christmas, knowing that boy or girl, the baby would have to be a Red Sox fan! Ha Ha It was cute picturing Chad baby shopping.

My Grandbaby

2008-09-17T00:07:00.004-06:00

I can't beleive how she's grown. I am going to visit the first week of October. I can't wait!!!!!!!

Who is this other picture of can you quess?

Fall is coming quickly

2008-09-12T09:35:00.011-06:00

Fall in Albuquerque

Balloon Fiesta

I love fall, it is my favorite time of year. I love the crisp feel of the air on my face as I walk Aaron to the bus. I love the smell of the rains that we have been blessed with. It reminds me of baptism when everything is cleansed and made pure. It makes everything more beautiful. It is also State Fair time and Balloon Festival. The State Fair is just about the same every year, but when I think of it I remember past fair days with our family, roasted corn, and of course Turkey legs. Great stuff!! I love driving and seeing beautiful colored Hot Air Balloons dotting the sky. The smell of fresh roasted green chile.It gives such great variety to the seasons.
State Fair Smoked Turkey Leg

State Fair Roasted Corn on the Cob

Smell of chile roasting

Taking it home to eat it!

So many things have happened this month, nothing spectacular, just busy. With the start of school, there were supplies to be bought, numerous trips to UNM bookstore( too many and too much!), routines to set in place and new teachers to adjust to. It is always an exciting new beginning of another adventurous year, and a sad realization that time goes by too fast. Unlike most mothers that can't wait to scoot their kids out of the door after the long summer, I miss their smiles, teasing, companionship, and spirits round about me. I go through withdrawals when school starts. It is so sad how much control the school has on my children. They reach the age of 5 and they are controlled for 5 days out of seven, for 9 1/2 months of the year, and they call you by their teachers name or worse....call their teacher mom!!!!!!!!!!!! Sometimes I contemplate home schooling again. Wish I was more confident that I could provide all the educational needs of my kids.
I have so many projects to get accomplished though and am not sure where to start!!! I have been spring cleaning in the fall since my house and yard were kind of neglected while I was gone this summer. The saying "It's easier to keep up than to catch up" sure keeps coming to mind lately. As soon as I finish the closets and cupboards, I am going to finish my painting job I started in the spring.
Kristin is in a new relationship with a kind, attentive guy she met a year ago and just hasn't had the chance to get to know until now. Both Kristin's best friend and her new boyfriend's best friend got married in August and in setting up and chivalrying their car, got together. Both were tyring to figure out where they stood now that their friends were married and now all they can see is each other, so that made the transition easier. It is great to see my Kristin happy again. She loves his family and he seems to love us. My boys already consider him a brother and pick on him all the time. He seems comfortable around us and natural... like what you see is what you get. He is polite and gracious. He offers help and wants to do service for us. He is really into (maybe a little obsessed) with sports and cars. The boys in our family really like sports too. Being a Cowboys fan is a plus too. Sports can be great fun, but I feel there are so many more spiritual things in life that our time can be spent on. Too many practices and games on Sunday or YM/YW nights can pull them away from the gospel. Balance I think is important, and God and spirit should always be first. Cameron served an LDS mission in France and is active at church. His dad is in the bishopric in his ward. I feel he is a little too tough guy at times and he is quite competitive, but he does have a softer, gentler side if you draw it out. I also know that he can protect and keep my Kristin safe and wouldn't hesitate to do so. He is very motivated and goal oriented. I see the best in him when he talks about his mission experience and his family. It sounds like his mission was a tough road but great life changing experience at the same time. He is smart and working on being an Opthamologist. Family is of great importance to him and he wants to settle here. Yeah! I can also tell that Kristin has made quite an impression on him and his family. There have been quite a few hints lately as to their future intentions. Kristin was in a relationship last Jan - May and they were talking marriage in the fall.... Well obviously that didn't happen. They parted ways and moved on in their lives. I am so grateful that Kristin is so in tune to the spirit and talks often with her Father in Heaven. She felt that this last relationship wasn't meant to be. I know that when the time is right, she will know with out any doubts.
As a mother though it is so hard to see your kids trials and emotions at this time of their life. You want to support their choices of possible eternal mates and make them part of your family... Then for one reason or another circumstances change and they move on to look again. The kids move on, but how does mom move on from one possible new son or daughter to another. These kids become part of your lives and you forever care about their well being, both spiritual and physical. I am finding it hard to open my heart as much this time to the possibility of a new son in law. I want to be excited and happy for them but feel such reservations. It's like a protection in case things don't work out this time. (What do you think?) Kristin keeps asking me what I think of him. Cameron and I have talked quite a bit and although the two are so different, the differences seem to compliment each other, which could be a great strength together. I know they are to the I love you's already and things have progressed quite quickly. She also asked her dad the other night what he thought of Cameron. His comment was... I don't think about Cameron... Should I? He said he talked a lot and seemed like a nice guy, but....................... You know no one will ever be good enough for my daughter. I don't think that is what Kristin wanted to hear, but she should have known that would be his reaction already.
Eric is a senior this year and many plans are already in the works. He has made a decision to serve a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and has already been talking to the Bishop. It is something he has considered for a while. He has prayed and struggled with what he wanted to do after graduation. He wants to go into CAD design. He contemplated the service (mom's worst fear) He contemplated serving a mission. He had a great experience at EFY at BYU this summer and said he finally knew that he wanted to serve a mission before he started his career. Most young men graduate at 18, go to school and work a while until they turn 19 ( age to be eligible to serve) and then leave on a two year mission. Eric was held back years ago and is already 18. He will turn 19 in December. Bishop wants to submit his paper work in December... have Eric receive his call in March and leave by June 1, 1009. This would be about 3 weeks after he graduates. This is a great sacrifice for the young men who serve. They put their educational plans on hold for two years to serve the Lord. They can write letters, but have no verbal contact except for Mother's Day and Christmas. They watch no TV, listen to only gospel music, get up at 6:00 and do scripture study... walk, ride bikes, or rarely drive a car to teach whomever will listen 6 days out of 7. They get one day a week to do laundry, wear comfy clothes and rest. I have yet to hear a young man say it was the worst choice of their life. Instead I see young men come back grown men... spiritual men... strong men... ready to tackle whatever life may throw at them. They say it was the best experience of their lives, not always the easiest, but the best. I am excited for Eric and yet the mother in me already misses him. He does everything for me! He has been given a gift of talking and getting to know people though and I see him being a great influence for good in the world. I know his rewards for this decision will be great and eternal. I have a feeling this year will fly by faster than any other for me.
I also have a trip planned next month. After crying and missing my babies in Utah, my husband had a frequent flier ticket and I am going back to Utah for 5 days. Yeah!!!!!!!!!!! Then it won't be so long till I see my kids at Thanksgiving. Thank you honey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay so this is why I should do this more often.................
Too much info at one time. Sorry!
Til next time.

Sympathy and love to a friend

2008-08-19T09:18:00.007-06:00

In behalf of Sarah's family, I have been asked to let as many of her friends know that she lost the baby. She is in the hospital and heavily sedated. Please keep her in your prayers and be ready to give her a lot of love and support at this time.They know that we kept in contact over the Internet and felt it was better for me to post something than for her to have to explain her situation right now. They didn't want everyone asking where she was... how is the baby etc...Having gone through this 4 times myself, it is a devastating time for them. We all wish them great comfort, our love, and our heartfelt prayers at this time. We love them with all our hearts.
Our family has been through some rough times over the years with childbearing and due to circumstances that have taken place with this family friend, I felt compelled to share some of my thoughts with you...
Finding out that you carry life within you is an indescribable feeling. Regardless of what society says, you feel their little spirits bond with you immediately. In 1994 I carried an angel baby to term and she passed away within 3 hrs of her birth. I was grateful for the gospel in my life and the knowledge of Heavenly Father's plan. I knew that we came from the spirit world to earthly life to gain a body. Most of us have to stay here and go trough trials to perfect our spirits to return to Heavenly Father. Others like my Shaina Rose only needed her body to complete her task here on earth. Her spirit was so pure as to only have to brush through this life briefly. Heavenly Father made it as easy on me as He could. I had the joy of carrying her without knowledge that any thing was wrong, I felt her life inside me, I got to see her stare into my eyes and speak to my soul to say "Mommy I love you , but I can't stay!" We let her go back to Heavenly Father with the knowledge that we will one day have the opportunity to raise her and get to know her in our next estate. She never had to suffer the crulties of this world and her exhaltation is sure. Now we have to live worthy to be with her every day of our lives.
Having this knowledge however still doesn't ever completely fill the void of her companionship. I still long for the day when I can again hold her and get to know her personally. Until then I know she is on her Father's errand.....I was awakened after crying myself to sleep one evening by a little boy standing by my bed saying "mommy be patient, I'm coming" I knew that although I didn't have the opportunity to raise my Shaina, Heavenly Father still had plans for my family.
After Shaina's passing I found myself pregnant 5 month's later. At 8 weeks I had not had my first appointment yet with the Dr. One evening I had excruciating pain in my abdomen and some spotting. My husband drove me to the ER and I found that my pregnancy was ectopic ( in the fallopian tube) I was hemorrhaging internally and my blood pressure and heart rate dropped. They did emergency surgery on me and my heart stopped on the table. They pulled me out of it and by a miracle The baby had not ruptured my tube, but was on the outside edge of the tube going to the ovary. The baby had gotten so large that instead of rupturing my tube and losing use of that tube, the tube was separated from my ovary and it was able to be reattached.
In the summer of 1996, I again was pregnant and because of my previous ectopic pregnancy, I was sent at 7 weeks to have an ultrasound. The technician was extremely quite and said I need to see the Dr immediately but wouldn't tell me why. I got a phone call from the Dr. They said they needed to do emergency surgery immediately. I felt a whispering to mt spirit that said "Don't have the surgery !" My Dr. freaked out, yelled at me and said I could die. They kept calling me all day so I left with my parents camping and while I was there I passed the baby. When I got back all the tissue was gone and everything was fine. I f I had the surgery, the Dr. may have taken the tube as the baby was in the middle and I would have lost my chances of having another baby. A year later I delivered a beautiful baby boy Aaron came into our lives and our family was complete. I'm glad I listened to the promptings I was given. There are so many things in life that we don't understand and may never understand, but I know that God does and he will never forsake us in our time of need. We just need to leave that part of our spirit open and live our lives the best we can so we are in tune to hear Him.
I found out that I was pregnant again in 2005 and was shocked. I had prayed that if God had another child for me that it would be soon after Aaron so they would be close in age. There was such an age gap between Eric and Aaron. He it is 8 years later and I'm pregnant. Feelings of inadequecy poured through my thoughts and soul. It took me until the ultrasound at 8 weeks to come to terms with the pregnancy. I saw the baby's heartbeat and felt all was well until My Dr kept making appointments for me weekly and couldn't get a heartrate in the office. I was sent to ultrasound again at 12 weeks and as usual the technician was quiet and said I needed to go back across the street and see the Dr. again. I had seen enough ultrasounds, that I knew I hadn't seen a heart rate and the baby hadn't grown much since the last one. I had gone to the visit alone when I was told to go home and wait for the baby to pass by itself if possible. This was 4 days before my oldest daughter's wedding reception. I felt so numb knowing I still looked pregnant, but no life was in me. I started miscarying the day of the reception and passed the baby. It was terrifying to me, my husband and my mother. I made it to an hour of the reception and came home in pain. The baby had been gone for at least 3-4 weeks. I hadn't passed the rest of the tissue so had to have an in office D&C with no anethesia. It was so painful. I pray none of my girls will have to go through so many trial when their time comes to have children.
A dear friend of my girls has had a rough experience with the loss of a child and my heart pours out to her. One of my favorite sayings that keeps me going is... " I never said it would be easy, but I said it would be worth it!

I am back with my girls again!

2008-08-05T13:55:00.008-06:00

Another trip from New Mexico to Utah. Our trip went fast and Aaron kept me entertained on the way. Also the motivation of missing my girls! Aaron wanted to see Shiprock for the last three years so we went that way this time. He took pictures. Then we stoped by Hole in the Rock to go potty and saw this gigantic mouse eating cheese and had to take a picture. I got there and I couldn't believe how Zoe had grown. I needed more pictures of her with her mother. Zoe was Blessed in church on Sunday and Aaron and I were the only ones from the family to be able to come back up again.The blessing dress was a little big and I had to make a few last minute adjustments to the shoulders but we got it fixed. I think this was one of my longest projects ever. Hope I can still do it again for my other kidos. I guarantee no two will be alike! We went yesterday and professional pictures done. They are much better at it than grandma. They were incredibly beautiful. To our family, we will be able to share them with you by e-mail in 10 days. You can view them and even order some if you wish. We got some ordered for the family, but just a couple of poses. So I'll let you know soon where to go to see them. I got an extra day ( darn it) because the Price canyon is closed today for construction so I can't leave until tomorrow. I won't see them now until Thanksgiving. I thought the last trip home was hard. Any way here are some pictures and I will fill in the holes from the last couple of weeks later.

Christ like Love Radiates

2008-07-23T19:00:00.006-06:00

In the eyes of a little child, much is learned!

The Visitor
Author Unknown
Found on site for LDS inspirational stories.

When I was 18, as I was preparing to serve a mission, my bishop called me to teach the Sunbeams. I had never before learned to love others more than myself until I had served those children in such a simple assignment. With time and patience I learned how to keep those seven children in their seats and listening to a simple lesson.

One day I invited Mike to come to church and sit in my class. Mike was my age but had stopped attending church completely by the time he was 12. We had remained friends over the years as I had served as the deacons quorum president, the teachers quorum president, and the first assistant to the bishop in the priests quorum. He had been the topic of many fellowshipping discussions and was often part of my prayers as the years passed.

Once in a while Mike would accept my invitations to come to an activity. It always surprised me when he did, so I kept inviting him. At the time, Mike had long black hair and a beard. His complexion was dark and pleasant. I don't remember when I invited him to my primary class, but one day he showed up.

"Class, I would like to introduce you to my friend Mike," is how I began my lesson. "He is visiting us today." Mike sat next to me in front. The children sat in a semicircle with their eyes fixed on him. They were much quieter than usual. I was about five or six minutes into the lesson when one little boy got up from his chair and walked across the room and stood directly in front of my friend.

The boy paused for a moment and then climbed onto his lap. I continued with the lesson as I watched the two of them from the corner of my eye. The boy sat looking into Mike's face. Mike was quite uncomfortable but did not interrupt the lesson or turn the boy away.

The other children watched the two of them for a few minutes. Then one of the girls climbed off her seat and approached Mike. I was intently interested in seeing how Mike would react and did not want to instruct the two children back to their seats. The girl stood with her hand on Mike's knee looking into his face.

Then it happened. The boy on Mike's lap reached up with both hands and turned Mike's face directly to his. I stopped my lesson to see what was about to unfold. With the innocence of a child, he said to Mike, "Are you Jesus?"

The look on Mike's face was total surprise. It seemed, as I glanced at the children's faces, they all had the same question on their minds. Mike looked at me as if to say, Help, What do I say? I stepped in. "No, this is not Jesus. This is his brother." Mike looked at me as if in shock. Then without hesitation the boy in Mike's lap reached up and wrapped his arms around Mike's neck. "I can tell," the boy said as he hugged Mike. The rest of the children smiled and nodded in agreement as their simple question was answered. Mike blinked back the tears in response to the love he felt from this small Sunbeam.

The lesson went on, but that day the teacher who taught the most was a three-year-old child. Mike spent more than a year getting ready to serve a mission. It thrilled me to learn that he left for the mission field a few months before I returned. I still think of the scripture in Matthew 18:5:

"And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me."

A few more precious moments with my babies

2008-07-23T14:01:00.011-06:00

Here are some highlights from my visit. There really isn't any way to fully describe what being a grandmother feels like until you are one. So much love!!!!!!!!!!! Grandma and mom get to give baths. etc...Grandpa Aunt Kristin Aaron and Eric spoiled her too! Aunt Danielle and Uncle Chad came to visit. You can't tell their proud at all can you?

Been busy! Great Busy!

2008-07-19T18:16:00.005-06:00

My time is ending soon with my kidos. I am leaving home Monday. It has been a great adventure and will be hard to leave. I am homesick though and miss my husband and daughter. They are going on a father/daughter date tonight. I am going to miss my babies extremely. I have so many unfinished projects hanging at home and have abandoned my Relief Society Presidency long enough. Things just aren't the same in someone else's home. I wouldn't trade the last few week for anything though. I will be back to Utah for the baby's blessing.( another long drive) Good thing love and loneliness is a driving force. Danielle and Chad have been here this week and time seems to just slip away with us wondering what exactly we did each day. We had a girl's night out Thursday. Katrina got brave enough to go to a bead party at her sister in laws. We made jewelry and drove by to check on the progress of their new house. Nothing!!!!!!!!!!! They were supposed to have started breaking ground the week Zoe was born, but not a thing has been done. The kids found out that the seller they were working with quit and the builders couldn't find the paperwork. Now their move in date has been pushed to November. That means the kids will have to move in in the Utah winter now. That stinks. Yesterday I got to keep Zoe while the kids went to the premier of the new Batman movie. We went to the apartment pool last night and Zoe had her first outing in the stroller. They watched us play and we walked back and tried to find enough towels for all of us. Today has been a lazy day. The kids are at the pool again and Katrina and I are here hanging out with Zoe. Nell and Chad fly home tomorrow and we go home Monday. Hope all goes well with new motherhood for my big baby!

Here are even more!!!

2008-07-07T13:39:00.004-06:00

Okay! More Pictures

2008-07-07T13:15:00.003-06:00

Pictures were hard to get this week. Zoe had a rough first 24 hours her first day home on Wednesday July 2. She wasn't comfortable, Happy, or Satisfied. she Wouldn't latch on and eat long enough to bring down the colostrum. She came home at 11:15 am and never really ate. At 1:15 that night Mom and Dad were frazzled. I calmed her down and took her to the living room and held/ comforted her for about an hour and a half so so mom and Dad could sleep. Then she woke up and stayed awake crying until 2:00 am. I had Katrina use the breast pump with hot compresses to start stimulating her milk production. She was only able to get a little colostrum in a baby dropper after 20 or so minutes of pumping. I asked her if she had some formula and she did. I gave it to her and she guzzled it down. Katrina started crying and I felt so bad for her. I reassured her that as soon as the milk came in things would get better. Zoe slept finally for 31/2 hours in my arms so Mom and Dad could sleep. Needless to say in a 2 bedroom apartment no one got much sleep except Aaron who slept through it all!!!!!!!!!! The Dr saw Zoe the next morning and said to continue to supplement her until the milk came in. She has been so much happier since. She was jaundice though from the hemetoma(probably spelled it wrong) on her scalp from delivery. Zoe had to bake in the bili lights for a while so picture taking was delayed. She is doing better now and we took tons of pictures yesterday. She did get out in time for Aunt Kristin and Grandpa Steve to hold her before they flew home Sunday.

More pictures

2008-07-01T16:28:00.005-06:00

She's here!

2008-06-30T18:19:00.005-06:00

Zoe decided to pick her own time and we went to the hospital @ 2:30 this morning. Dr wasn't readily available to give pain meds so Katrina had to do it on her own. She was such a trooper. When they did come in she didn't even flinch with the epidral. The baby had some problems like being posterior( upside down, heart rate dropping and staying too high in the uterine cavity. They had to start pictocin to get the contractions working more efficiently, but it often caused a lower heart rate for the baby. She did finally rotate in the end. It was rough but Zoe came in all her glory 1:37 pm today weighing 8lbs6.9 oz 22inches and has lots of dark curly hair. She is just beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Matthew myself and katrina's sister Kristin were able to coach and be there for the delivery. Wow!!!!!!!!! So different being on the other side of a miracle. Dad and grandma almost lost all vocal coaching ability as tears began to flow at the sight of her curly lock hair crowning. Today my baby became a woman! She did it with all the power grace and courage of ten thousand armies. I am so proud of her! Will post pictures soon. The camera is still at the hospital with Mom and Dad.

Rest in Peace Lina

2008-06-25T12:07:00.008-06:00

You are already so missed in our family! May you know you were greatly loved and stayed with us too short of a time. Til we meet again may God keep you in His care!
Your loving family

Impatiently waiting!

2008-06-23T13:42:00.005-06:00

Well I am in Utah waiting for my grandbaby to make her grand entrance. Katrina called me on Wednesday morning the 18th of June and said she had gone to the Dr and had changed from 2.23 centemeter dialated to 3 + so I told her I'd pack and head to Utah. I was reluctant to leave as I needed my car serviced and our little dog had a rough week( she got skunked in our backyard and in the eyes). Eric got my car serviced and I ended up leaving NM @2:00pm. This trip gets longer and longer! Needless to say we made it up here thursday instead of Wednesday as Katrina was still doing okay and I was tired and afraid to drive through Price Canyon in the dark! We got here and so far no baby. A few false alarms though. I got a phone call from my son on Friday the 20th and said he was in a accident (taking our dog to the vet for a recheck on her eyes) He was a little hysterical, so I couldn't understand him. I told him to call his dad and then call me back. All I could understand was something about being hit by a black vehicle. Lina ( our dog) being taken over to the vets and Eric's chest and side hurting. My husband took off work to go meet Eric and by the time he got there, the cars were towed and he went with Eric to the hospital. I sat for 3 hours waiting for word and in the meantime called my daughter in NM to go get our dog and check on her. She called back and said that Lina was dead, a bump on her head and her neck was broken. To some this might not seem so bad, after all my son was talking and walking. We got news around 7:00pm that Eric just had a deep bruise from the seatbelt, but nothing was broken. They gave him pain medication and sent him home. I am so grateful he is okay, but am overwhelmed at the loss of our puppy. She was and will always be a part of our family and I am sure it will hit me even more when we go home and she is not there. I have had to take anxiety medication and sleeping pills at night. I do okay durring the day but pictures of what might have happened still come into my head when I try to sleep. I feel such a hole in my heart. I got Lina after having a miscarriage and was home alone with the kids in school. She's been such an joy and great company. I can't seem to feel better and my youngest son cried through his sleep a couple of nights. It seems to come and go in waves. My son's car is totalled and he is without transportation now. I had figured that all my kids at home were self sufficient at home while I was up here and he has no means of transportation now for work or to look for a job, not to mention band camp starting the end of July.I have never felt so torn. I have always been there for my kids in hard times and so many thoughts have gone through my head. If I had waited a few more days, I could have taken her to the vet, Eric's car would be fine and I wouldn't be in so much agony. However, if I had stayed, I might have missed my time with my daughter to see her have her first child. Life really stinks sometimes!!!!
I hope Zoe gets here soon so we can again feel joy and a new beginning. I also pray that my babies with be safe and healthy. It is so different worrying about your baby having a baby and if everything will be okay. Heavely Father gave me such an overwhelming capacity to love and it causes me much heartache sometimes.

Stay Balanced!

2008-05-16T23:42:00.000-06:00

I have felt a little overloaded recently as I have contemplated all the events that have happened and are yet to happen. I thought I'd share a little soul searching with you. I've compliled a few of my thoughts on summer.
Summer has arrived and now what? You’ve worked hard all winter and are ready to use your well earned vacation to escape, play, and have quality time. The kids are home from school for the summer and you have to keep them entertained and enriched. It is warm and you can do outdoor activities, visit family, visit places you’ve always dreamed of going. The possibilities are endless... right?
Summer can also be a time when we as women overload ourselves with so many activities that by mid - summer we are tired, irritable, unhappy, stressed etc… The rigors of the planning weigh on us and we forget to take care of our most basic needs. We set up well laid plans and then suddenly unexpected situations happen that seem to pull us in too many directions. We feel we are failing because we aren’t accomplishing all the things we dreamed would happen this summer. Stop! Breath!! Set short term realistic goals for the summer. Take care of yourself first and you and your families will be happier. Find some quiet time regularly to think deeply about where you are going and what you will need to do to get there. Pray and be in tune to the Spirit so the Lord can guide your choices. He might bring to mind a better activity than you had already planned. Take care of you and your family’s spiritual needs first. “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you” (3 Ne. 13:33). Prioritize and make the activities quality, activities. Don’t book every minute of your day. Leave time for family, for service, and to just relax and be yourself. • Make the best use of the time you have, and consider eliminating less-important activities. Get organized and write important events on a calendar. Watch your spending. Get enough rest. Exercise is listed as the #1 reducer of stress and promotes physical and emotional wellbeing. Take some time for yourself so you can be there for others. “Do not run faster or labor more than you have strength and means … but be diligent unto the end” (D&C 10:4). Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t meet all your goals. Look at what you did do this summer; you’ll be surprised at what you did accomplish. Life is too short and we never know what tomorrow may bring so make the best of each day. You are precious in God’s sight and he loves you. Start a great summer!

. STAY BALANCED!
• Put the Lord first in your life. Always make time to pray, and read the scriptures daily.
• Get organized. Make a “to do” list or a schedule.
• Prioritize. Decide which things are most important and do those first.
• Write important events on a calendar and refer to it frequently.
• Keep the Sabbath day holy. You might not think there are enough hours in the day to do all you need to do, but remember Sunday is the Lord’s day, and He will bless you if you are obedient.
• “Do not run faster or labor more than you have strength and means … but be diligent unto the end” (D&C 10:4). Make the best use of the time you have, and consider eliminating less-important activities.
• Ask for help. Turn to your family, friends, or teachers if your load becomes unbearable and you don’t know what to do.
• Pray for help. Heavenly Father knows the pressures you are under, and He can help ease your burdens.
• Listen to the Spirit. You might feel prompted to do something you hadn’t planned on doing.
• In all your scheduling, don’t book every minute of your day. Leave time for family, for service, and to just relax and be yourself.

More Baby Shower Pictures!

2008-05-14T17:52:00.000-06:00

So My daughter wants more pictures from the baby shower so I am adding some more. Mostly she wanted her hubby to see the quilt that I still have to bind. I still have some work to do on some of the items I have for Zoe and she wanted to know if I'd be done. I'm not sure if I mentioned it in my previous blogs, but I was put in the Relief Society Presidency at church. I have had to learn a lot and play catch up with my frequent trips lately. We are going up to Utah the last week of May so my 18 year old son can attend a Youth Camp at BYU called Especially for Youth. They stay in the dorms for a week. Learn to be gentlemen/Ladies,have spiritual speakers on church topicssuch as:(,Morals,datting and preparing for their future),participate and watch talent shows,see musical presentations,have dances where the boys have to escort the girls on their arm, get to meet and associate with other youth of their faith and beliefs. While he is there I get to spoil my other kids some more. I'll come back home again for a couple of weeks and then return to awaite Zoe Madison Jackson. I think I will hate the gas industry by the end of the summer! Ya think!
Any way here are a few more pictures.

Happy Mother's Day

2008-05-13T23:15:00.001-06:00

A Baby's Conversation With God...

A baby asked God, 'They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?' God said, 'Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you.'
The child further inquired, 'But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy.' God said, 'Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy.'
Again the child asked, 'And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?' God said, 'Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak.'

'And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?' God said, 'Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray.'
'Who will protect me?' God said, 'Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life.'
'But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore.' God said, 'Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you.'
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, 'God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name.'
God said, 'You will simply call her, 'Mother.'

Going Home Happy Mother's Day Mom!

2008-05-08T00:58:00.000-06:00

My Dad has been ill and in a nursing home for the last three weeks. My mom had previously been hurt when my dad took her down when he fell. I hoped she would get some much needed rest while Daddy was in the care center, but not when they don't care for him! My mom is so tired and spends as much time as possible there. She finds him left on the toilet, messy and no one around. He doesn't get fed if she isn't there to help him. He's been in the emergency room twice, once with stitches from falling off the bed and once because they wouldn't get a doctor there to treat his pnemonia and upper respiratory infection. She is trying to get him released and home by this weekend. She is lonely and does as much for him up there with no place to relax as she would do at home. I don't want her to not have any kids home for mother's day. I hope our arrival will sooth her soul a little. I admire and love her so much. I hope I can have the patience, endurace, and strength at age 81 to do what she does. She is amazing and has alway been such an example to me.
I am taking my daughter Kristin with me as she is having a rough week. We thought we had adopted our new son in law to be.....things didn't work out so well. She had been unhappy and miserable and they decided to break thing off. She said it was hard, but feels a feeling of relief and comfort after much prayer and soul searching. She went to the temple grounds the other day and came home crying. I know it is hard now not only for her but all of us. It is amazing how much you come to love the companions and friends your children bring into your life. I know Heavenly Father will help her find the right eternal companion someday. I'ts not always an easy road though.
Steve's dad is getting worse with his alzheimers and they had to sign papers last week to reserve a private nursing home room for him. It really stinks to see your parents age ungracefully. I pray when it is my time to go I go to sleep and wake up in heaven like my Grandmother Elder did.
My good news or bad, it depends on how you look at it. I have been called to the Relief Society Presidency as 2nd Councilor. I am excited and a little nervous. I can's wait to see where Heavely Father helps me to grow. I love doing music and still am since we are kind of music poor in our ward, but it is nice to stretch the spiritual growth some more. I have wonderful sisters to work with and enjoy their spirits and companionship. Ask me in a few months if I'm still excited. We had our first enrichment board meeting yesterday and it was so fun hearing everyones great ideas. Let's see if we make out okay for my first enrichment on June 5!
My other good news! NO MORE PROJECTS FOR AARON'S ClASS! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!Tommorow we get rid of the stinky plant he has been watering with milk. Yuck! It finally had to be moved to the front porch. I was getting a little grumpy after 4 major projects in the last two weeks, a book fair, and a field trip. I love helping so much but I'm a little on overload lately.
Sorry my blogs are so depressing! Baby Zoe is almost here though and I'm sure the mood of my topics will soon change. Katrina was just here for her shower and of course we didn't get enough time. We had fun poking Zoe and chasing her around Katrina's belly. Danielle even go out her stethescope. I asked Katrina if she felt violated yet! Ha Ha She said she was enjoying the attention. I love them all so much! Missed Daddy Matt though!
God Bless til next time!

Life Needs Little Laughs But Big Ones Are Better!

2008-05-05T00:57:00.000-06:00

I have had so many events happen this month, that it will take me some time to relay them. Sad and stressful, Surprizing, and Exhilarating.
Until then......
I am passing on a BIG LAUGH to all as I really needed one myself. This is from one of my adopted kids blogs.I adopted her in spirit as well as many others over the years as they brushed through my family's lives. Kristen I love you! Thanks for the laugh!

For those of you who wax, you will understand fully and those who don't will never make this mistake. Better go pee before you read this. This is by far one of the funniest things I have ever read.Hair Removal...(I don't have a clue as to who wrote this, but....WHAT A RIOT!)All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The Epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the wax. Read on.........My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours:'Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.' So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom.It was one of t hose 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees.('Cold wax,' yeah...right!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it *was* a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!!I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. CRAP! Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is spinning and spotted. I think I may pass out...must stay conscious...must stay conscious.Do I hear crashing drums??? Breathe, breathe...OK, back to normal.I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip. There's no hair on it. Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip...it's not! I touch. I am touching wax.I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake...remember my foot is still propped upon the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.Sealed shut! My butt is sealed shut. Sealed shut!I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself 'Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off!' What can I do to melt the wax?Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right??? *WRONG!!!!!!!*I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgi cal equipment - I sit.Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub...in scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter 'So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!'There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located, 'Are we talking cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?'She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.While we go through various solutions. I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor . Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!!By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event.My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!!The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend. It's sooo painful, but I really don't care. 'IT WORKS!! It works !!'I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair....THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF IT!So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.Next week I'm going to try hair color...

Hope you enjoyed this as much as I did!

March Madness!

2008-04-08T13:40:00.000-06:00

The closet that flooded is finally repaired! Yeah! I just have to shampoo the carpets in the bedroom and put my son's room back together. Thanks to Tony I didn't have to work too much this time. just cleanup and painting. It took a little longer than expected due to a much needed vacation to see my expectant daughter and husband durring Spring Break.
It was so great to see them. I took up a Jenny Lind crib, changing table, cradle,bassinette and boxes and boxes of clothing that have traveled around the family. My van was quite loaded. My best friend and her daughter and grandaughter went up to Utah with my son and I. It made the trip go by so much faster to have someone to visit with. The kids either play games, sleep, read books, or watch movies while I count miles and road lines. It is still hard on the back to sit for so long. We got to "Hole in the Rock" and my son was insistent on me stopping. I told Him I'd stop for a potty break, but we weren't going in the gift shop. He reminded me that on our last trip he saw a sword there and I told him if he saved enough money, the next trip I would stop and let him buy it. I had forgotten and he had his saved money in hand. We agreed that with all the stuff already in the van, a stop on the return trip might be more practical. So we proceeded to Salt Lake.
It was a short and mixed emotional trip. My son in laws grandfather passed away and there were some hard feeding spreading throughout his family at the time due to some past experience. I felt so bad for my son in law. He was trying to take the higher road and mend family feuding so as to honor his name sake and comfort his grandmother and aunts. I pray that hard feelings from his parents might be softened and knowlege as my son in law put it that " it is for all men to forgive, but I the Lord will forgive whom I will forgive" Will come back to them. It took a lot of courage to do the Lord's will and let past grievences go. He will be blessed eternally for his efforts to mend the family ties here on earth. I pray for his comfort and the Lord's abiding companionship durring this trying time.
On a great note. I got to feel my granddaughter move inside my daughter. I'm not sure there are words to express my feelings. I am so excited for them, yet afraid that something might go wrong. I will be so relieved when she is born and ALL my babies are safe. I wish I was closer to help more and to see the growth of this little one. I still can't beleive that I am going to be a Grandma. However, after looking in the mirror this weekend and my mother pointing out to me that my gray haired roots were shinning again, "Grandma" seems to fit. Time to get out the bottle of hair dye again!!!!!!!!!!! So much for all natural!
Upon our return home I got news that my 81 yr old mother who is sole caregiver for my 90 yr old father fell trying to move my dad and tore her hamstring, got a hemmorage in her muscle and had some fluid oozing in her hip socket. The doctors said they didn't feed that surgery was waranted as of yet, but would commence with physical therapy three times a week in her home. She has hired a nurse to come every morning M-TH to help get my dad up and dressed. She is on her own on Fri-Sun. I went down this weekend to help so she can heal, my sister is going down next weekend and my brother is going down the following weekend. I am planning on spending the first weekend of every month with them to help with yard and household upkeep. I am hoping more help will come from my siblings. It is hard to see your parents age and lose their capability to care for themselves or each other. I am trying to convince my mother to sell out and move up here with me so I can be there on a daily basis. It's hard to leave your home and deel with change at that age. It's hard to stay home for me and cry because I can't help more.
Well on to my next progect. I am painting my living room and kitchen so I can get the trim and baseboard put back from our remodle job a couple of years ago. So many complications in our life have postponed our finishing.I'm actually not sure there is such a thing as finishing. I think it is more a work in progress!
Love and best wishes for all til next blog!

Rough few weeks

2008-03-14T00:30:00.000-06:00

I started getting spring fever as the temperatures warmed up. I took a break from our never ending house remodeling over the past couple of years. I was so tired of projects, especially after a wedding, a sealing, a 50th anniversary and Holidays. So I went and bought some paint and decided to paint my kitchen and living room. Everything is bright white and I wanted to warm things up a bit. Change is always a good thing.
Then my garbage disposal broke and spewed water all over my kitchen through the air valve by the faucets on the sink. The pipes under the sink shook loose and I had water everywhere. I have cleaned the drawers and cabinets with Clorox cleanup and everything in the kitchen still smells musty.
So on Tuesday the 11th of March, my son came in and said his carpet was wet in his closet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The piping for the hot water heater is in between his closet wall and the water heater closet. We have had problems there before and had to rip out the dry wall and have the plumbing fixed. Then of course we had to repair the closet wall. Well two years ago we got rid of our 21 year old carpet and put in all new flooring. Now I have soggy new carpet and a ripped up wall again. I just starting crying yesterday. It is so expensive to replace things as they fall apart and I have done all my own work for 25 year to save $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ I chiseled out old tile and laid new ceramic tile. I've ripped down pony walls and redid the dry-walling. I've rota tilled outside. Built a wall between my entry hall and the laundry area. I've ripped out cheep cabinet bases and rebuilt them with plywood. Any way you get the idea. I'm getting old tired and broken!!!!!!!!!! The plumbing leek was the last straw. It has taken a toll on my body and the doctors told me this last year that I couldn't do this hard labor any more.We had bad builders who put in polybutaline piping that had been banned in construction now. There was a law suit against the company a bout 10 years ago, for fixing and replacement. However, the stipulation was that you had to have a visible leak at the time of the suit. Of course my problems started about a year after the time period expired. I'm always a day late and a few dollars short! Any way my son is back in his brother's room sharing until we can dry out and re fix again. Luckily a good friend from church does construction and came to my rescue. I told him I'd pay him to just fix it.
My son also had a project for History on Family History, so I have spent the week gathering my stuff and scanning baby pictures and family pictures for him to use in his report. Needless to say, my spring projects are on hold for a while. Maybe next week.
My youngest son has a report on Mozart so I am helping him gather info. He has to write a biography, have a poster with both hand drawn and printed pictures. He has to dress up like Mozart, because they are doing the presentations like a wax museum of the people. He has to do a demonstration of what made him famous, so we are now learning a short Mozart piano piece for him to play on the keyboard. Wow! I don't remember these kinds of projects when I went to school. We're talking 4th grade!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought I was done with school. I keep asking the kids "When do I get my report card.
Well on a good note, Spring break is coming up and I get to go to Utah to visit my oldest baby who is having the baby this summer. She just had a little pooch at Christmas. She sent me a text pic of her tummy. So CUTE! I cant wait to feel the baby. We have a home to live in, and we will own it free and clear in two years. My husband has a great job and I can stay home, and my children are all happy and healthy!
It felt good to vent. Best wishes to all for now and God bless you all.

Playing catch up

2008-02-11T17:15:00.000-07:00

December 2007
Dear Friends and Family,
This has been truly an eventful year for our family. We are all doing fine and our family continues to grow in more ways than one. In January our 2nd oldest daughter announced her engagement to her high school sweetheart of 5 years. We began to set in motion plans for an August wedding. We got the dress ordered and started stocking up on supplies for the decorations. We found material for the bridesmaid dresses and our plans came to a halt.
Last February I had to have an emergency hysterectomy because I was hemorrhaging. That kept me down for a couple of months and left me tired and anemic, but I am constantly gaining on it. I am still blessed to be able to share what limited music ability I have at church by being the ward music director.
In April my dad, eighty nine years old, underwent surgery on his neck to fuse the vertebraes together. They had twisted until the spinal cord was pinched and calcification had grown in between. His discs were deteriorated. They went in through the front of his neck and scraped out the calcification. Then they had to realign the vertebraes and pin them together with a plate. We knew the risks at his age were high. If he didn’t have the surgery and kept falling with his dizzy spells he could be paralyzed the rest of his life, however at his age the anesthesia could cause problems. He went through surgery well, but he had a terrible reaction to the anesthesia afterward. He hallucinated and thrashed out at the nurses and mother. He also couldn’t swallow because of moving his vocal chords and esophagus out of the way for the surgery. They put him on thickened liquid diet, yuck! He was placed in a rehab hospital and moved from El Paso to Las Cruces. This didn’t go well either. He thought we had put him in a nursing home and he wanted out. Mother ended up putting a cot in his room and staying with him. The doctors thought his reaction to the surgery was causing Alzheimer’s and depression and gave him medication that he didn’t need that made his mental state worse. They sent him home with a neck brace and put him on home health care to rehabilitate him. He just has gotten worse and worse. He is now almost completely wheelchair bound and can hardly converse. I miss my dad! My mother has been a saint. She works way to hard and her health isn’t what is should be. We celebrated daddy’s 90th birthday at Thanksgiving in Silver City. All of the kids were there and several of the grandkids.
Steve is still working hard at Transcore and still loves playing golf. He has been such a support to our family throughout all our experiences. He is such a great husband and father and we love him dearly and don’t often enough give him the praise he deserves. He continues to sing in his church Choir and share the talents God gave him.
Kristin is still attending UNM. She has been quite busy. She is in the Relief Society Presidency in her singles ward at church. She is in the institute choir and just did a wonderful Christmas program. She attends religion classes. She is pursuing a degree in elementary education.
Eric is now a junior in High School. He has become interested in Computer Art Design Architecture (well besides girls) and is doing quite well. He has plans to pursue this field for a degree after he graduates. He is the only priest left in our ward at church and has to pull a lot of weight in his church responsibilities. It is tough at times and he misses many of his friends that have either been split into another ward area or have graduated and moved on to college or missions. He has many young men looking to him for guidance and examples. A few new young men will become priests soon. He is still such a help to me at home. I don’t know what I will do when he leaves home. He has me spoiled. He better pass down his skills to his brother Aaron before he goes anywhere!!!!!!!!!!
Aaron is in 4th grade this year and still loves school and reading. He is having a competition right now with one of the boys in class to see who will finish the Harry Potter series first. His first love is knights and dragons though and he has completed several books on the subject. I am still trying to get him into some other genres. He is a great boy and so obedient. He loves God and it shows in all he does.
Our summer was spent making wedding decorations dresses and invitations. On August 4, 2007 Danielle married Chad. She was beautiful and the wedding was so tender and beautiful. It was the first time in a long while that we as a family were able to do music together. It was such a rewarding experience. The kids were having a house built and wouldn’t be able to move in until Nov. so they lived with us for a while. I think they are enjoying having a little privacy now! Danielle is so busy. She got a job as a nurse tech III in the emergency room at Presbyterian Hospital. She works there 36t hours a week, goes to school at UNM and still works her job for 10 hrs a week at Defined Fitness Gym. Now that they moved out neither her husband or us get to see much of her.
After the wedding, we (including Danielle and Chad) drove to Utah to be with Matthew and Katrina our oldest. Danielle and Chad honeymooned in the mountains just NE of Salt Lake. Matthew and Katrina being married civilly 3 ½ years ago, were sealed (married for eternity) in the LDS Salt Lake Temple on August 8th. A day we will never forget. They made vows and covenants to God to follow all his commandments and live righteously so to be man and wife not until death do us part, but for time and all eternity. Their children will be born under this covenant and be sealed to them as a family for all eternity. We drove back home on the 12th and moved Chad into the house.
In September we celebrated Mom and Dad’s (Leo and Susie) 50th anniversary in Santa Fe. It was wonderful. Mom and Dad Catanach have also had a rough year with health and stress. Dad’s dementia is continually getting worse and it wears on Mom so much. All of Dad’s brothers and sisters were here for the party. We ate, danced and got acquainted with family again. We hope to stay in touch more often.
After trying to have a child for the last couple of years and going through some frustrating months even seeking help from infertility specialists, Katrina called us in October to tell us that they were pregnant and we were going to be grandparents. They were just getting ready to start some infertility meds when they found out. It is always hard to hear that it will happen in the Lord’s time, but all things happen in His wisdom and timing. It is great to see her so happy. The due date is July 4th, 2008. Isn’t it ironic to have such an independent child have an Independence Day baby! Ha! Ha! They are coming home for Christmas and we are so excited.
Through all the trials and joys this year we have been greatly blessed by the companionship of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and God our most kind a gracious Father in Heaven. It never ceases to amaze me how much abundance, love and support they pour upon us for even just small little requests. At times I feel my needs are so small and insignificant compared to the needs and trials of the world, and yet no righteous request from me is too small to be granted by God in His time. I feel His constant companionship in all I do. I recognize His hand in all matters of our lives. The more we read his Holy Scriptures, Pray, and ask His guidance, the more blessings he bestows upon us. It is easy to use life’s busyness and excuse our way out of doing His will. If there is one thing I have learned in life is that tomorrow may not come, so live every day as if it is your last and you will be standing before God this day for judgment. Time is a short and precious thing. Make the best of it and have no regrets. If we slip, fix it now and don’t procrastinate.
I pray that we all recognize His hand in all things and show gratitude for His greatest sacrifice in our behalf. He sent His only begotten son even Jesus Christ to this earth to set an example for us to live by. Despite the miracles, love and shedding of blood in the Garden of Gethsemane in our behalf, he was cast down, tortured and hung on a cross for all mankind. As we celebrate Jesus' birth this Christmas season may we more remember that as he was born, yet he lives. He was resurrected, His body reunited with His spirit as we too can be resurrected and live again after this mortal life. As a parent I can’t imagine making that kind of a sacrifice with my own child. God loved all of so much that he wanted all of us to return to him and together with his son Jesus Christ created a plan of salvation so that we might return to him. We don’t have to sacrifice as greatly as Christ for our salvation. We just have to believe, take upon us His name, follow his example and try to live our lives the way he has shown us. We have to live this life not only during the holidays but all year. May we turn to him daily and ask what we need to do to make a difference and do as he asks. He is always with us! “Knock and it shall be opened unto you ask and ye shall receive….” Miracles do still happen every day and will continue to happen because God loves us. May God bless you and your family this Christmas and throughout the year to come is my prayer in Jesus’ name, Amen

With all our love and best wishes for everyone now and always,